Rolayo's Journal is the very interesting story of a young lady. It's a journal that showcases what she passes through- the fun times, the not-so-fun times, the temptations and the trials of her every day life. It's a journal being kept for her unborn child who she plans to call-"Kikelomo"....It's being featured on this blog occasionally on Tuesdays. Just incase you missed the last journal entry you could catch up HERE
Here's the 35th journal entry...Enjoy!
Title: "Perception (Part 2)"
Remember my cat print fabric? It has be hidden.... Taken without my consent and put far away from my reach. And it was expensive (*tears*)- 450 naira for the singe yard that I bought. Imagine. In these economically strained times it’s a lot! (to me anyway). All of that is on the side sha.
Now to the business of the day. Hehee! I started talking about perception in my last entry, but I didn’t go into a lot of depth about the issue. In your life time, you are going to be under constant scrutiny and observation. You are going to get the chance to make a million and one “first impressions” to a million and one new people that you meet. You are also going to have people who make it their life’s mission to continuously monitor you and what you do and how you’ve changed. But don’t take it too seriously, look at it as an opportunity to present yourself to the world, prove the haters wrong and make your fans proud (LoL! @ fans).
During my six years in secondary school, when I used to hold things much too tightly to my chest, I had a very hard time dealing with people and their constant scrutinizing and prying eyes. If i could re-do those years, I would take all the talk and assumptions and rumours with a tiny pinch of salt, because really, they only talk about you due to your news-worthiness. I remember on one of my birthdays, maybe my 14th or 15th, as a birthday present one of my classmates told me that I was assumed to be a snob. It bothered me sooo much, because one thing I strive not to do- is look down on people. I believe in treating every single person with respect and of course, I expect that from other people (but I know now that its a tall order). So I went days upon days beating myself up over it, until I realised why it would be easy for someone outside looking in to come to that conclusion. It’s because I am introverted, and I was at the peak of introversion at the time- so what to do? I had to try to come out of my bubble, or shell if you prefer a bit more. That whole situation has helped me in my life after that point. So the dude ruined my birthday, but helped me.
Another one....this one is just lame in the hundreds of ways that I try to look at, but anyhow. I don’t know if you’ve noticed that there are these 2 or 3 people who constantly look for things that they can do or say to bring you down or taunt you - and it’s hardly friendly teases. I don’t know if you have such people in your life. If you do, please there’s no need to have such negative energy around you, it’s bad for you. And talking about friends, well, that’s gist for another day. These people started hounding me about the way I walk ooooo! Abeg, help me. I never even noticed I had a ‘way’ of walking. Silly something. And trust the small girl that I was then naaw, I started trying to pay attention to this ‘way’ that I was strutting, that would cause another human being to make it their own headache to disturb me about it. Over the years, I realised that it wasn’t actually a bad walk, it was actually a pretty ‘skenzy’ walk- so you know, I don’t blame them for noticing. (*smug smile*).
Look...this should be your game plan. Know yourself, and be yourself- don’t let another human being with a tiny head like yours make you second- guess your own self. Secondly, some of these observations might turn out to be really helpful. If everyone you meet has the same negative first impression about you, then you should work on it- improve. Also, there’s no need to get obsessed about rumours or criticism. Hear them, sift through them, take the useful information, and throw the rest out the window. Life is too short to burden ones self about what other people think about you. Yes!